How can I get into heaven?

(A true Story from an Irish Sunday School Teacher)

I was testing children in my Dublin Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven. I asked them, “If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?" "NO!" the children answered. “If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden, and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?" Again, the answer was "NO!" “If I gave sweets to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?" Again, they all answered "NO!" I was just bursting with pride for them. I continued, "Then how can I get into heaven?" A little boy shouted out: "YUV GOTTA BE FOOK'N DEAD."